I slave over my writing - polishing and rephrasing, eliminating repetition and anything that sounds vaguely like a cliche. In speech, however, I umm and ahh and go over the same ground several times, losing my thread and wandering off at tangents.
When I read an article about me, even if it's absolutely lovely, I see myself distorted, like a reflection in a warped mirror. I did say that but it's not exactly how I meant it, or they got one crucial word wrong (in one case transposing a he for a she). I spend too much time wondering how I look from the outside. It's not good for my health.
This won't last, and I know I should enjoy my brief celebrity. It's the result of hard work by Scribe's amazing publicist and resident astronaut, Emma, and journalists who need to fill column inches or air time. And I hope it encourages people to buy the book that I spent so long labouring over, which of course is the point of it all.
My daughter Meg has been whipping these interviews onto the website that she built for me as quickly as they appear. I think I'll be ready to read them properly and relish the moment when it's passed and the anxiety has drained away. When I'm home on the farm I'll be able to look back from a more relaxed position.
Maybe I'll even miss it.